There's a lot of controversy out there about natural childbirth, with many people thinking it's better for the baby and others thinking it's just a way to torture yourself unnecessarily. In this week's Sex Talk Realness, Cosmopolitan.com spoke with three women about their experiences with trying to have a baby the old-fashioned (and often very painful) way.
How old are you?
Woman A: 35.
Woman B: 29.
Woman C: 47.
How many children do you have?
Woman A: One 3-year-old and I'm pregnant with my second.
Woman B: Two.
Woman C: One.
If you have multiple children, did you have a natural birth with all children or just one child?
Woman A: I didn't have a natural birth with my first child, but I did with my second. With my first child, I was geared for a natural water birth in a hospital, but I wasn't dilating, so I needed to get a C-section that I really didn't want. One of the nurses said she could open me up manually, but I wouldn't be able to handle the pain of that, so I would need to have an epidural. I agreed to do that just to avoid the C-section and it worked, so at least I was able to have a vaginal birth with my first.
Woman B: I had a natural birth with both children.
What made you want to have a natural birth?
Woman A: I started researching the benefits of a water birth, and you can't take drugs if you have a water birth. Also, my first baby had a hard time latching onto my breast and my body wasn't properly responding to her, which I believe is because of the epidural I got during labor. I wanted nursing to go more smoothly the second time, which is why I wanted to do a natural childbirth. The water birth seemed like a great way to manage the pain.
Woman B: I'm always interested in the science behind things and a natural birth seemed to be the healthiest option in a low risk pregnancy.
Woman C: I always knew I wanted to fully experience the birth of my child without medication.
Was money a factor in choosing a natural birth?
Woman A: No.
Woman B: No.
Woman C: No.
Did you do a lot of studying on how to have a natural birth?
Woman A: I took a hypnobirthing class, which was very helpful. I definitely needed some kind of plan for how to deal with the pain.
Woman B: I read about natural birth, took many birthing classes, and also took a birth hypnosis class called Hypnobabies.
Woman C: I read a lot about natural birth methods and took birthing classes.
Did you tell anyone you were having a natural birth while you were still pregnant?
Woman A: Yes, I told people my goal was to have a natural water birth with both pregnancies. I think they thought I was a hippie, which I'm really not. A lot of women would say things like, "Why would you torture yourself?" and things like that, so I didn't talk about it too much. If you tell other women that a natural childbirth is important to you, other women seem to think you're judging them for taking drugs during the birth, or trying to act like you're better than them. I tried to just tell them that I thought my first baby had some issues from the epidural, and I wanted to avoid those issues with the second child.
Woman B: I told quite a few people I wanted to opt for a natural birth. They were skeptical when I mentioned it with my first child, but I'd become a doula by the time I was on my second pregnancy, so they trusted that I knew what I was doing because of my training for that.
Woman C: Yes. I told my husband, my parents, some friends, and my doctors. Most people were supportive. My mom was concerned though, and one male friend thought I was crazy. One of the doctors in the practice was also very dismissive when I told him I was going to have a natural birth. He said something like, "Everybody says that, nobody does it." After I did it, I did understood why he felt that way. I think most women go in wanting to do it, but get scared into taking drugs because it's so much more painful than you think it will be.
Did you do any special exercises before your due date to prepare your body for birth?
Woman A: No, I just did a lot of walking to induce labor.
Woman B: I made sure to stand up straight to avoid having a posterior baby, as well as lots of squatting to open up my pelvis.
Woman C: I did loads of pre-natal kundalini yoga and walked a lot.
Did your husband/partner prepare in any special way?
Woman A: He took the hypnobirthing class with me. He was very supportive of the water birth.
Woman B: He took a childbirth hypnosis course with me. It basically helps you to deal with labor by mentally transforming the feelings of pain into more comfortable sensations.
Woman C: We took a birthing class, which was geared towards women looking to have a natural birth. They did go over what drugs or procedures were available if we changed our mind though.
Did you have any fears?
Woman A: Definitely. I was afraid of how painful it would be.
Woman B: I think my main fear was about having to push. Losing control of my body frightened me due to personal issues from my past where I wasn't given control of my own body. I really wanted to have that control during the very intimate act of birth.
